Hi Lorel,

While it's so cool, interesting, fun, etc. to be involved with something you believe in and that your children take part in, I have found it's not much fun to do it alone and be responsible for everything. Then it becomes burdensome. It sounds like your association is excellent, so I would assess the 200-some "members" in terms of who else will help. Are many of them on their way out like the former leader? Are they burned out, or are there a lot of newcomers with enthusiasm & energy. Now would be the time to set up a reorganization meeting (not once you've tried it and found it to be overwhelming). Committees should be set up, with clear responsibilities. A leader doesn't do all the work, but facilitates. If you take it on, realize it will impact your time, family, other commitments. Make sure others in the group are going to help and that it's important to you.

I work with one other woman in our local gifted association. We do almost everything, and I definitely wouldn't do any of it if she weren't doing it. I think it's very important work (advocacy with the State, district, gifted department, speakers for our meetings, newsletters, science festival coordination, etc.). And there's so much more that could be done (Math Club, Spelling Bee, National History Day, etc.), but we cannot do it ourselves. Even though parents of gifted students (similar to parents of homeschoolers) are usually a very active group, no one helps and some have petty peeves IMO.

Good luck with your decision.
Cym

Ditto on the petty peeves. I seriously cannot get a parent who wants to spend time complaining about a volunteer, but can't find the time to do any of the work themselves.

Our homeschool group has one unusual rule (at least in my experience): petty griping behind the back of the organizer for an event is strictly forbidden. I mean strictly. Like you get one warning and then you're out of the group. If you have a problem, you are required to address it with the person handling things. Period. If it's not a serious enough issue to talk to the planner about it, then it's not serious enough to talk about behind her back.

That and the strict RSVP rule (also one warning and out if you break it) are really the only two rules, but they're good ones. I strongly suspect that they're the reason our group is extremely kind to one another and yet still runs like a German clock!

Of course, I am an INTJ/Spock on the Meyers-Briggs personality test, so I WOULD like rules like those...

Those sound like pretty reasonable rules to me. It's sad the first rule needs to exist in the first place. Isn't that just good old common sense and courtesy?

LOL! Yup.

Actually the RSVP rule is courtesy, too. But having courtesy codified and punishable by removal from the group seems to help a lot with making it actually happen. I've been in too many groups that allow/encourage rudeness and petty nonsense. I like that this group makes it clear upfront that it just won't be tolerated.

Lorel,

My first thought was that if you have to ask, it's probably not the right time for you to take this on. Then, I read your post about the boy scout thing taking 4 hours and I think you've got your hands full.

It sounds to me like the group needs to formally organize, with that many people and with the "leader" leaving. Perhaps you could suggest to her that she consider this as her parting gift and that you'd help. Once the group was organized, with a board, you might be able to be the president and rely on others for other duties.

So, I guess that's a vote for "no, not crazy, but close!". Know, though, that we're here to support you whatever you decide.

Not to hijack Lorel's thread, here, but I'm facing a similar dilemma. DD6 is being zoned to a brand new elementary school next year and I've been nominated as PTA president for the school's first year. No one else was nominated for this office, probably because no one really wants it. I'm an INFJ; does this mean I shouldn't do it? Actually, I can think of a lot of reasons why I shouldn't do it. But I'd never really thought of the whole INFJ thing as being an issue. I haven't thought about that label in years! I'm intrigued. Kriston, please tell me more!

Lorel, I totally agree with everyone who has recommended that you not do this alone. There's no way I would even be considering taking on the role of PTA president if it weren't for the fact that I truly trust the person who will likely be the VP. We look at it as being a team effort except I will run the meetings and speak publicly, which I don't really mind doing. The team approach is the only way I could still feel like I will have something left over for my own 3 kids, and I'm not even homeschooling! Good luck to you as you make this decision!

Thanks, friends, for all the helpful insight. There's no way I could manage to do as much as S did solo, but I am not beating myself up over it. She is one in a million and has grown the group from scratch, gradually adding new activities as the group has enlarged. I realize that I would have to have help. I just talked to her about sitting down together to write out all the things she does and then I can try to chop it into smaller bits that I can assign or request volunteers to fill. The parents in this group are very helpful and I don't think there will be any problem filling posts. It's not like cub scouts, where every year we'd beg and plead for helpers and the same half dozen people would always end up doing all the work.

My heart tells me that I want to give it a try. But I am also trying to listen to my head, which is something I often neglect to do! I'll let you know how things progress.

Good luck. I'm sure you'll be great. Too bad we don't live closer. We'd definitely join and help out.

I'm glad you're taking it on and getting help. I know lots of people would disagree, but I think you're making a good choice. Maybe because I rely so heavily on my homeschool group, I know how wonderful and important a good group is. Frankly, if I were asked by the current leader to step up, as you were, then I'm not sure I would actually say no. I'd worry that I would be a bad choice and I'd screw things up, but I wouldn't--couldn't!--let the group die. It's not like scouting or coaching soccer teams or any of those other activities. It's a vital lifeline for homeschooling families. A good HSing group makes HSing work.

I think you'll make an excellent leader, and I think you made a good choice.