Yup, squirt. I think one of the hardest decisions to make is when you're making progress -or- when you're not and it's time to cut bait!

P.S. to 'Neato: note that advocacy was the big-girl pants path, yet that's the one I didn't take! LOL!

Hmmm, ya' know, I think Dottie still has my big-girl pants, actually...

Definately! I have big guilt about leaving DD5 in her situation all year. My advocacy had some success, but not until school was almost over! It will be worth it if she is positively affected by it NEXT school year. But if no change, all that misery for naught.
Let's hope she has a better year in first grade!

Hi 'Neato,

I don't know if the acceptance we have encountered about my dd's whole grade skip has to do with the fact that she is in a HG school and everyone is sort of used to all the kids being different and at different levels.

I don't really have any patience for toxic people, however, so I feel that had I encountered some hostility from some of the parents I would just move on and not try to explain or justify my dd's skip. I had to convince myself as I am generally not completely sold on whole grade skips, but I don't believe I need to convince anyone else. I sort of have a thick skin that way.

What you did was brave, don't let anyone else take away from that.

Oh yeah....the big girl pants! Unfortunately I ate so many cheese puffs while waiting for those Explore scores, that I still need 'em, .

I should add that my need for a "party line" is mostly in my head. I've pretty much gotten total support, if a few odd looks from the community and the teaching staff that has been in contact with DS since last year.

We had a borderline-obnoxious article done on DS last summer, and I had some very unexpected support. A few people that barely knew DS went out of their way to congratulate him and make him feel good.

The only truly toxic situation came from two high up admins, and neither had ever met DS. One is no longer on his case whatsoever, despite his position, and the other has been playing very nice ever since.

Anyway, just wanted to give a big kudo to our public school that has ultimately been very accepting and supportive of an unusual situation. In part, it IS advocacy that paid off, but another huge part has been DS proving himself along the way.

SQUIRT!!!! YES YES YES!!! Exactly. I see a long road ahead and I've already dragged my feet too long wondering perhaps he's just above avg, they all even out by 3rd grade, maybe we'll get that great teacher next year.....

I've come to the realization after reading all these posts that I either

a: live in an alternate universe; or

b: am totally incompetent at picking up social innuendo

I don't recall ever hearing the nastiness that a lot of you have had to put up with. And as far as advocating, I feel like I've barely broken a sweat compared to what some of you have gone through. And teachers? DS11 has only had one bad teacher so far in his whole school career. DS8's teacher this year is so good I'm considering "undoing" his grade skip so he can stay with her another year.

I'm going to send my good "mojo" out across the web for you all! Here's hoping for some happy endings!

(And if it really is just ignorance on my part - well as they say, it's bliss, and I'll just keep it that way!)

Neato,

I spent most of a K year getting prepped to advocate, getting test scores, and making nice and I didn't get effective at demanding more until almost the end of K. Just to give you some hope, first grade worked out exactly as planned with much better accommodations and much better teacher situations and even support from the school. I worried that I'd become one of those parents, when the teachers and principal actually agreed with us that radical things needed to happen -- it just took months to get everyone on the same page. I also wondered if all the plans would come to fruition in first, but they did. I'm hoping your DD gets what she needs next year and try not to give yourself too much guilt. I think it's hard to advocate much until the school knows the kid and that takes months (sadly), not to mention how slow the test score acquisition process moves.

Suppport, support and more support!

You all are so great! Thanks for all the kind thoughts.
I'm very happy to know that many people have had a great experience from their respective communities......I think that goes a real long way in helping someone new to this advoacating stuff give it a try!
Yes, toxic people stink. Maybe it is I, CFK who is just too aware and sensitive to negativism. Want to trade? I'm glad your community and school support you! We are also receiving the warm fuzzies and help from school, YAY!!
Gratified, I so hope we will have the same experience that you had.
I think I will just go through the summer expecting that we will!
If not, I'll deal with it then.
So to summarize:
Perhaps the party line is that we really don't need one?

((tossing guilt feelings out the window))

Thanks friends!
Neato

LOL, 'Neato.

But I will say in all seriousness that for me at least, having a pat answer has been really helpful. It's easier to shrug if you aren't shocked and lost for words! A party line helped me personally to feel less like I needed one, if that makes sense: it left me less exposed, less insecure, feeling less likely to be surprised by a nasty comment that I wouldn't know how to handle.

I think of my pat answers as my security blankets. Ever since I've had them at the ready, I haven't needed to use them in my defense. To me, that means they're probably working!

I guess maybe I should just tell people how I really feel:

I'm just trying to do the best I can for my kids.